Post by Farrelei on Jul 10, 2009 23:25:47 GMT -5
I mentioned earlier I was a writer, so I've decided to share a bit of my poetry.
These six are going in a competition next week, so I'd love feedback/criticism.
These are six of my favourite poems, please read and hopefully enjoy
(I don't expect anyone to read all of these, but I need help with the poem titles as I just whipped the titles up on the spot. I hate titling poetry >.<!)
Birdsong[/u]
I want to see you fly on afar, little bird.
Won't you answer me?
How exciting does it feel
To soar through those bright-blue skies;
How serene to drift off to sleep
Far away from the woes,
And the worries of below?
Your song makes me smile, little bird.
Won't you sing?
How happy do you feel
As you sing to your neighbours
And they sing back to you?
If you could teach me how to fly, little bird,
I'd fly far away from here with you,
And we'd play hide-and-seek together
Within white clouds hanging in blue.
Won't you teach me your songs, little bird,
So I may wear this smile always,
And sing with you in afternoon chorus
Until our voices become weary
And can sing no more.
Night Train[/u]
Frost and tiny crystallised breaths,
Painted masterfully on the windows.
The stench of times long past remain surrounding
But I've gotten used to it, it's comforting.
The night outside never disappears, it continues.
On the bridge I see a light shining.
There is no-one there with it, it just shines by itself
Awaiting someone to befriend
And watch the dark blue waters ripple with it
Even though it will shine forever watching these waters
And forever be alone.
The train's warm lights are now the only thing shining,
As birds and people alike - asleep for the night.
A restless breeze blows through a single tree,
I smile for I know I'm not the only one awake now.
The breeze can't see me, but I watch it's path as it swims through the silent city.
I clench my ticket in hand as the melodic music of the train comforts me.
The ticket reminds me that I have to depart, somewhere.
But I don't know where that is yet.
I don't want to depart-
I want the train of the night to carry me forever
And watch as passengers come and go,
Like silent corpses they sit alone.
The ocean waves lapse over one another far under the night train, the rain falls forever with the darkness.
And occasionally in the reflection of the moon as the clouds remove themself from her vision,
The rain will shine like gold as it falls, a beautiful shimmer in the darkness.
And I smile silently in the cold interior
Of the train in the night, as it forever rolls along.
Without[/u]
Teach me words that mean everything, please.
Hand me more than painted mask.
Hang the darkness and light high
So it's pierced within your eyes.
A soundless cry one must know,
Hands me more then questions.
This unwanted warmth I don't understand...
It won't tell me, friend or foe?
Coldness buried inside shadow,
Haunts me even more.
And with me no real hope.
But I have dreams with me.
If they last forever, I won't get too bored.
Location[/u]
It would be nice to be understood,
Great to be completely unknown.
It would mean much to be remembered,
More to stay alone.
It would be peaceful to hear silence
From voices calling throughout,
It would be comforting to know
Only you noticed doubt.
I'd like to understand,
And to stay forever oblivious.
To remember all,
But willingly forget.
I would stay silent,
I would notice...
But I just don't know how...
Please tell me where we are...
Stories[/u]
White hair over tired, green eyes.
A smile that can only be made
When reminiscing, a faint one.
Staring out over choppy green sea,
Cool breeze blowing freely.
Wonder what she's remembering,
Wonder where she's been...
Every person has a story, see.
Most will be like your average book,
They'll just give you the same crap.
But occasionally you'll find a masterpiece.
Sometimes you'll get hooked,
You can't wait to hear more...
Others a story'll just end, abruptly.
Sometimes you just won't relate...
Others you won't let go, you'll take almost anywhere.
The best piece is unique,
Written to one's best ability.
Some'll be boring though, almost like...
The author gave up somewhere around the middle.
Me, I prefer to read those stories.
I love writing, I really do,
But life is just one genre I find I'm a bit lacking.
Last Leaves of Autumn[/u]
Last leaves of autumn...
Falling.
The coldness comforts you.
Sit alone now, and watch
As others walk past.
The sundown from that hill
Black birds flying by...
The last memory
Of a beautiful day.
The warm hand interrupts
Winter's embrace...
You smile because
It will never exist...
The cold will be bitter,
The night will sting.
And there will never be
The most important thing...
Only fragments of shadows
And scents that will linger
In order to haunt you
And watch you shed tears.
Once again in the soft black clouds,
As together you are one
And all at once you are
All but pitiful.
Leaves, wave goodbye as you go.
And I'll wave too
Please, just for a moment...
I wish my passing
Could be as beautiful as yours.
These six are going in a competition next week, so I'd love feedback/criticism.
These are six of my favourite poems, please read and hopefully enjoy
(I don't expect anyone to read all of these, but I need help with the poem titles as I just whipped the titles up on the spot. I hate titling poetry >.<!)
Birdsong[/u]
I want to see you fly on afar, little bird.
Won't you answer me?
How exciting does it feel
To soar through those bright-blue skies;
How serene to drift off to sleep
Far away from the woes,
And the worries of below?
Your song makes me smile, little bird.
Won't you sing?
How happy do you feel
As you sing to your neighbours
And they sing back to you?
If you could teach me how to fly, little bird,
I'd fly far away from here with you,
And we'd play hide-and-seek together
Within white clouds hanging in blue.
Won't you teach me your songs, little bird,
So I may wear this smile always,
And sing with you in afternoon chorus
Until our voices become weary
And can sing no more.
Night Train[/u]
Frost and tiny crystallised breaths,
Painted masterfully on the windows.
The stench of times long past remain surrounding
But I've gotten used to it, it's comforting.
The night outside never disappears, it continues.
On the bridge I see a light shining.
There is no-one there with it, it just shines by itself
Awaiting someone to befriend
And watch the dark blue waters ripple with it
Even though it will shine forever watching these waters
And forever be alone.
The train's warm lights are now the only thing shining,
As birds and people alike - asleep for the night.
A restless breeze blows through a single tree,
I smile for I know I'm not the only one awake now.
The breeze can't see me, but I watch it's path as it swims through the silent city.
I clench my ticket in hand as the melodic music of the train comforts me.
The ticket reminds me that I have to depart, somewhere.
But I don't know where that is yet.
I don't want to depart-
I want the train of the night to carry me forever
And watch as passengers come and go,
Like silent corpses they sit alone.
The ocean waves lapse over one another far under the night train, the rain falls forever with the darkness.
And occasionally in the reflection of the moon as the clouds remove themself from her vision,
The rain will shine like gold as it falls, a beautiful shimmer in the darkness.
And I smile silently in the cold interior
Of the train in the night, as it forever rolls along.
Without[/u]
Teach me words that mean everything, please.
Hand me more than painted mask.
Hang the darkness and light high
So it's pierced within your eyes.
A soundless cry one must know,
Hands me more then questions.
This unwanted warmth I don't understand...
It won't tell me, friend or foe?
Coldness buried inside shadow,
Haunts me even more.
And with me no real hope.
But I have dreams with me.
If they last forever, I won't get too bored.
Location[/u]
It would be nice to be understood,
Great to be completely unknown.
It would mean much to be remembered,
More to stay alone.
It would be peaceful to hear silence
From voices calling throughout,
It would be comforting to know
Only you noticed doubt.
I'd like to understand,
And to stay forever oblivious.
To remember all,
But willingly forget.
I would stay silent,
I would notice...
But I just don't know how...
Please tell me where we are...
Stories[/u]
White hair over tired, green eyes.
A smile that can only be made
When reminiscing, a faint one.
Staring out over choppy green sea,
Cool breeze blowing freely.
Wonder what she's remembering,
Wonder where she's been...
Every person has a story, see.
Most will be like your average book,
They'll just give you the same crap.
But occasionally you'll find a masterpiece.
Sometimes you'll get hooked,
You can't wait to hear more...
Others a story'll just end, abruptly.
Sometimes you just won't relate...
Others you won't let go, you'll take almost anywhere.
The best piece is unique,
Written to one's best ability.
Some'll be boring though, almost like...
The author gave up somewhere around the middle.
Me, I prefer to read those stories.
I love writing, I really do,
But life is just one genre I find I'm a bit lacking.
Last Leaves of Autumn[/u]
Last leaves of autumn...
Falling.
The coldness comforts you.
Sit alone now, and watch
As others walk past.
The sundown from that hill
Black birds flying by...
The last memory
Of a beautiful day.
The warm hand interrupts
Winter's embrace...
You smile because
It will never exist...
The cold will be bitter,
The night will sting.
And there will never be
The most important thing...
Only fragments of shadows
And scents that will linger
In order to haunt you
And watch you shed tears.
Once again in the soft black clouds,
As together you are one
And all at once you are
All but pitiful.
Leaves, wave goodbye as you go.
And I'll wave too
Please, just for a moment...
I wish my passing
Could be as beautiful as yours.
